


love is a cryptid too

by maraudersourwolf



Series: thiam half birthday 2k18 [2]
Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Coworkers, Alternate Universe - Human, Attempt at Humor, Believer Liam Dunbar, Falling In Love, Fluff and Humor, Idiots in Love, M/M, Mutual Pining, Skeptic Theo Raeken, Supernatural Hunters, buzzfeed unsolved au, frenemies to lovers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-18
Updated: 2018-06-18
Packaged: 2019-05-24 19:37:28
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 12,783
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14960858
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/maraudersourwolf/pseuds/maraudersourwolf
Summary: When Scott and Stiles tell him that both Laura and Derek gave him the approval to his first project ever that’s based on doing a road trip to hunt cryptids and supernatural stories all over the country, trying and debunk mysteries, he thought it was the biggest success in his short career.His whole four years studying journalism couldn’t have prepared him for how much of a terrible fucking bad idea it was.





	love is a cryptid too

**Author's Note:**

> **THIAM WEEK | DAY 2: CELEBRITY AU**
> 
>  
> 
> This was born due to hours upon hours of watching BFU.  
> I am not sorry at all.
> 
>  
> 
> Barely, almost none at all beta’d.  
> Completely messy.  
> I still try to be funny.  
> Enjoy.

 

 

 

“You’re pairing up with Theo”

“What?”. Liam teared his gaze away from the screen of his computer to look at Scott and Stiles, both standing at the door of his cubicle wearing different yet impressively similar looks of commiseration. “But… I thought that one of you would--?”

“We can’t,” Scott cuts him off, shrugging apologetically, “We are full of projects to work on. We, Isaac and Boyd have tight schedules for the Dare Pack. Lydia, Allison, Cora and Erica are full on working with Girly Akin. Jackson, Ethan, Mason and Corey are doing the Runway Fashion, Brett and Nolan are doing the Tasty Taster videos. And that without counting the side projects and the blog managements and--”

“We are full, kiddo,” says Stiles nonchalantly, touching every single thing over Liam’s desk. The younger boy would feel annoyed in any other moment, but right now he’s in a state of shock.

It’s not that Theo is the biggest asshole he have met inside the walls of HowlFill, giving Isaac, Brett and even Jackson _and_ Stiles a run for their money. Or that the guy almost actively seeks to make his life a living nightmare, like eating the tupperware of cupcakes that clearly had his name on or that he took his parking space every day.

Or maybe the unnatural yet pretty real crush that Liam had had on him since day one and that he hopes someday will finally vanish into oblivion, because there’s nothing more pitiful than being head over hills for someone that barely if looks at you.

But it’s not that.

Not at all.

Although it actually is.

“But he--”

“Is a jerk, I know,” cuts Stiles, who doesn’t seem to be apologetic at all. He actually looks kind of amused. “But he’s the only one clear of projects at the moment, so you’ll have to settle down the expectations bar enough to get on his level”

Liam doesn’t want to settle down his expectation bar on any level, even less to match the spirit of denial the guy seems to carry around like a badge. Theo doesn’t even need to open his mouth to make people know what he thinks. His whole face is a huge sign of _‘I don’t believe shit’_. In fact, his face is most likely at the side of the word skepticism in the dictionary.

But he doesn’t want either to let die what could be his only chance to get more creative freedom inside his workplace.

It’s not hard to know where the scales tip to.

“Okay,” he finds himself agreeing. The words taste the same as those long lecture mornings in college, right after a party the night before. Like the worst decision he would ever take in his whole life. “I’ll work with him”

Or that’s the plan, at least.

He can always leave Theo somewhere along the road as a plan B.

 

*

 

By next morning, Liam isn’t exactly thrilled but he isn’t as bummed as the day before.

It might have something to do with calling Mason and ranting for more than an hour. Or killing zombies almost all night long while eating crappy food. Or it could be just resignation at what fate threw at his face. He doesn’t know nor care, really. The important thing is that he’s in a better mood than the day before, that the sun shines a bit brighter and that he’s ready to make this a successful trip.

“Dunbar, got me waiting here,” Theo greets from where he’s leaning over his truck, hands tucked inside the pockets of his jacket and his ankles crossed together in a pose that makes Liam think that maybe this guy watched every Travolta movie ever until he absorbed all the cool poses. And then there’s the smug smile that makes Liam want to punch him half the time and kissing him stupid the other one.

There goes the better mood.

“I’m on time,” he replies without looking at his watch or phone to verify. Most likely he isn’t, because that’s something that’s not programmed inside his brain. But he’s not going to give Theo the satisfaction to agree.

As if the jackass knew, the smile only widens. “Maybe I got here earlier, too excited to see your face”.

Liam rolls his eyes and stops in front of the other guy. There’s a bag on his shoulder with the clothes and basic necessities he’ll need for the road trip, slung over the bag leash is his backpack with his laptop and all the analogical resources he could gather and another bag on his other shoulder, with the whole filming equipment.

Theo doesn’t even move a muscle to help, still sunbathing like a fucking cat and looking at Liam as if he was the best treat he could ask for.

“Are you going to--?”

“Nope”. Theo makes emphasis in the last syllable and finally moves. To the driver’s door. “We’re leaving in two minutes, so you better hurry with those things. They seem heavy.”

With that, he just hops on his truck.

Liam stares at him, expecting the other boy to jump with a _ha! I got you, I’m not that big of an ass_. Instead, Theo opens the window. Because he’s clearly that big of an ass.

“One minute. Chop chop, Dunbar.”

Liam doesn’t even try to keep his swearing low.

 

*

 

“I didn’t take you for a supernatural kind of guy,” Theo blurts out of nowhere and Liam looks at him for the first time in the hour and half they have been sharing the small space of the truck’s cabin. They have been in a sort of agreed silence the whole ride and, even if Theo’s is the worst partner there could be, Liam can’t say he misses it.

“For what kind of guy did you take me?”

“For the one that’s not into supernatural things, clearly”

Liam sighs loudly in frustration, trying to not cave into his deep desire of just punching the other guy square in the face. “And you?,” he asks after a couple of minutes, once he gains back his calm. “Why did you agreed to this?”

“I thought you were supposed to solve mysteries here”

“No, we are supposed to debunk them”

“And here I thought we were the watered down version of the Scooby Doo gang”

“Why would you--? The Scooby Doo gang? There’s not even a dog here”

“I’m sorry to break this to you, Liam--” Theo gives a solemn second of silence, looking almost moved before breaking into an amused grin, “but everyone at HowlFill calls you _the puppy_. And it’s not because you’re one of the new members of the pack.”

“ _The puppy_? I’m not a puppy”

“Yes, you are”

“No, I’m not!”

“Oh yes, yes you are”

“No! I--”

“Oh, of course you are”

“No, I’m not, I’m-- Are you doing the good boy thing with me?”

“You’re too canny for me, I see”

“Fuck you, Raeken”

Theo winks. “Will take your word on that, Dunbar”

Liam has to remind himself that punching the other guy while he’s driving would lead them to an early grave.

And to shut the voice at the back of his head that hopes Theo really takes his word.

 

*

 

**Sallie’s House**

_Atchison, Kansas_

 

“Turn the light off if you want us to leave

They have been there for more than four hours and Liam doesn’t even know what’s happening at this point. It was supposed to be easy. Go in, do a quick swipe of the place, see how terrifying it was, and leave. Instead, they’re staying. The sleep bags promptly arranged in the almost empty living room, because he clearly left his common sense outside the door.

And Theo is goading the demon into showing itself, because _of course he would_.

The light turns off and Liam does his best to not freak out. A strangled noise that can only be described as pure horror gives away that he’s totally failing and Theo starts laughing. Liam wants to believe that maybe it’s hysterics, because there’s something very bad inside the house who wants them out of there and has no problem to kill them if they don’t, but it sounds more like the other guy is totally having the time of his life torturing him.

“Oh man, this is the best thing ever”

Why does it even surprise him.

“Stop provoking it!,” Liam hisses between clenched teeth.

“I’m not provoking it, I’m just--,” Theo gestures towards the flashlight before tuning his whole attention into it once more. “Turn the light on if you want to kill Liam”

“Did you just ask the demon if it wants to kill me? Theo, I’m--”

The threat falls flat at the light turning back on.

And nope, that’s all Liam can take. He has enough self preservation sense to not stay another fucking minute inside a house with this demon. And the extra dark entity who wants to kill him.

“Fuck you. I’m out, motherfucker”

“Did you just call a demon a _motherfucker_?,” Theo asks amusedly, watching Liam pack his stuff at the speed of light, “You? The one who literally seconds ago told me to not taunt it?”

“I’m leaving the fuck out, I don’t care if it hears me now”

“It could follow--,” the sharp glare with a tinge of terror that Liam sends his way makes Theo snort and barely hold back the laughter that tries to burst out of him. “Or not. Who knows. You’re the demon expert here. What does the wikiHow article say about this stuff?”

“It says that--,” Liam turns around, his backpack badly packed and the sleep bag barely is rolled enough to just make the security belt click. He lifts both middle fingers and shows them around to the space surrounding him, “-- fuck you, you can keep your fucking house, demon. I’m out.”

It’s a chorus of laughter that serves as soundtrack to each step he takes until the house is pretty far away and he’s standing at the side of the truck.

The relief washing over him is too good to even care.

 

*

 

“You know it’s not real, right?,” Theo’s voice is soft and careful, too strange for what he usually sounds like.

“Of course,” Liam says, words dripping with disdain, “The fact that a demon wanted to kill me it’s not real _at all_ ”

“I wouldn’t have let it do it”

Theo looks earnest, completely convinced that no supernatural bad entity would trespass his mere human body to get to Liam. The shorter boy can even imagine Theo saying something cliché like _‘over my dead body’_ that would lead to both of them getting killed instead of one. A supernatural version of every sickening romantic movie that, despite the clear interest Liam has on his coworker, does not appeal him at all.

Living is appealing. Totally and undeniably appealing.

He doesn’t mention the fact that if the demon tried to do it, there was nothing in Theo’s power to stop it, since most of the winning points were on the supernatural’s side of the table rather than the human’s.

And even if he wanted to say anything about it, there’s something fluttering in the middle of his chest that would stop him from doing so. Something akin to relief and reassurance and a little bit of _‘that’s why I like you’_ that goes beyond Liam’s comfort.

Instead he mumbles a barely audible ‘thanks’ and promptly grants the rapid beating of his heart to the ominous death threat he just got from a ghoul instead of his feelings escalating quickly.

Because between both options, the murder demon it's the safest one.

 

*

 

**Bobby Mackey’s Music World**

_Wilder, Kentucky_

 

Nightclubs are supposed to be fun, right? You’re supposed to go with friends or a date, laugh your ass off, get as drunk as you can and leave. That’s its whole purpose. To have a good time.

Then why in the all living hell is he standing in the middle of a haunted one, right after closing time, when there’s nothing more than darkness surrounding him?

No, he needs to reformulate that question.

What even is _wrong_ with him in the first place?

He saw the warning sign hanging over the entrance. Theo laughed at it and walked right in without giving it a second thought and Liam followed, like the puppy he still denies being. Because that seems to be a thing now, following Theo into danger.

Stuff happened here. Stuff that required to hang a freaking warning sign over everyone’s heads at the entrance. Heavy stuff. Why did he follow when he should have turned around and offer Theo as a sacrifice to whatever thing was inside?

“I hate demons”

“Very brave of you to say that in the-- what did they call it? _The gateway to hell_?”

“Why did I even propose this? What was I thinking?,” Liam mumbles under his breath, his gaze going on a wild ping pong around the dark room in a desperate and last minute attempt to see something even if he actually hopes to see nothing.

There’s a creaking noise behind him that sounds too much like someone walking. It could be reasonably explained as the house setting on his bones, surely. But in fact is setting on Liam’s nerves.

“I’ll get murdered by a ghost”

“Think positive,” Theo replies. “You wouldn’t be alone, you’ll get to be best friends forever with it”

Liam looks towards the direction where Theo’s voice is coming and throws a blind punch that collides against something too soft, that makes the other boy chuckle. It’s not exactly what he was going for but it makes him feel a bit more at ease,  so Liam will take it.

“Don’t tell me you’re scared”

He changed his mind.

“Scared? Who? Me? Pfft,” Liam dismisses it even if there’s dread coiling down in his stomach and the short hairs at the back of his neck are standing. “It’s just a haunted house. In the dark. And we’re trapped inside. No biggie, nope. Not at all”

“Are you sure?”

“Are you for real? Of course I’m sure. This was my idea, I’m a big boy, I can handle some haunted dark on my own. It’s not like a ghost could do me any harm, right?”. The silence stretches and Liam can feel dread creeping up his spine. “ _Right_?”

“Then I guess you don’t need to take my hand to feel better--”

It’s actually rather surprising how he aims perfectly and takes hold of Theo’s hand without being able to see shit in the pitch black nothingless where he’s just expecting for a floating head to pop out and scare the shit out of his soul.

Theo laughs and Liam squeezes his hand harder, as if afraid that he will be abandoned at any moment to deal with the vengeful spirit of the place.

“Not even a word,” he mutters but there’s lack of strength on his voice to sound threatening enough.

“Don’t worry,” Theo replies between a wheeze, “It’s all on camera”

“I fucking hate you so much”

“Such a big boy’s mouth you have--”

This time his punch hits something harder that cracks soundly and gets back a groan of pain.

But the grip he has on Theo’s hand doesn’t falter one bit.

 

*

 

“This place is so old and smells like mold,” Theo rants, the lens of the camera focusing on their surroundings. “Ghost are so dumb, why can’t they haunt a clean and neat place? What is it that makes them seek this horrid places?”

“I don’t think they get to choose,” Liam mumbles, baby blue eyes wide open, watching with ravid fascination the whole room. It is old, enough to not be really safe even if there wasn’t a supernatural hazard hanging over every patron’s head. “I think you just die and get stuck”

“How can you be so sure?”

“I’m not sure I just-- it makes more sense that way”

“More sense that way? Pfft, really?”

“Well, yeah,” Liam turns to look at his partner and frowns slightly. “You got a traumatic death, some unfinished business and _poof_ , there, you’re a ghost”

Theo watches him unmoving from behind the camera and Liam grows restless. He’s never been good with having the whole attention over him. And it’s even worse when it’s the guy he’s crushing on and a camera filming that, what? Millions of people will get to see later on? Pfft, no pressure. None at all.

God, why did he even accepted to do this.

“What,” Liam demands, more than asks.

“I’m impressed,” Theo replies. “Did all that knowledge came from your ghost connoisseur degree? Or it’s a natural talent?”

Liam huffs and turns his gaze away, flashlight in hand pointing at all the dark corners it can. “Well, tell me then how you’d end up being a ghost for it to have sense”

“First, ghosts don’t make _any_ sense,” Theo drawls. “And second, if they did - which they don’t - it would be to be a little shit,” he shrugs and points aimlessly to one of the corners Liam is illuminating. “Just for the gigs”.

“ _Just for gigs_? Are you serio--”

“Do it for the lols”

“You just--”

“Do you think a ghost can say _yolo_?”

There’s no worst punishment than being killed by a ghost or possessed by a demon, Liam’s sure.

Except, well, Theo.

 

*

 

The tattered door of the closet in front of him makes a cracking noise and Liam tenses, his whole focus suddenly there. There’s a small stool in front of it, keeping the doors closed, and on top of it a handwritten warning sign.

The door cracks again and it opens a smidge.

“ _Theo_ ,” he whispers, dread crawling up his spine. “Theo, _help_ ”

The door opens a bit more and then stops, as a silent invitation. Like the hundreds of horror movies out there. And Theo’s nowhere to be seen. It’s not long before his brain piece things together.

Liam frowns, his whole demeanor changing. Suddenly he doesn’t want to run out the place in a scream of fright, but rather step forward and punch the lights out of the jerk of his partner.

Which is what he does.

“I can believe you are as much of an asshole to cramp yourself inside there and do the most cliché horror movie move ever, I--”

Pushing the stool aside, he takes the closet handle and opens.

Just to find nothing.

“What are you doing looking at an empty closet?”

Liam swallows, closes the closet and turns to look at Theo, who frowns in confusion behind the camera.

“We are leaving,” Liam’s voice is squeaky. “Now”

The closet door creaks again but Liam’s already halfway out the room and ready to bolt with a yelled _‘nope’_ as his cry of war.

Or whatever is called his 99.9% cry and 0.01% war sound that comes out of his mouth.

 

*

 

Later that night, once they leave the horrid house and he’s laying on his motel room, Liam finds hard to fall asleep. Big part of it is due to whatever decided to open the door of that closet. Even if Theo assured him that there was no way that was something else besides a breeze and suggestion. Even if the older boy checked every closet in the motel room and went as far as to offer for them to sleep in the same room. But Liam can’t stop thinking that maybe whatever opened the closet door, now latched onto him.

What if he now has a demon that will open all the closet doors from his apartment? How do you even stop it? Safe proofing the doors? Exorcising the closet?

Just when he thought the closet would have just the harboring clothes inside use finally.

And then, there’s Theo’s taunt over and over repeating on his head. _“Such a big boy’s mouth you have--”_. It’s almost amusing how other parts of his body find themselves quite awake too.

Yeah, no. The closet is all for the demon.

 

*

 

**Bigfoot sighting**

_Willow Creek, Illinois_

 

“I can’t believe everything here is themed,” Theo grumbles, squinting out at the motel where Liam booked them in. The name in big white letters that say “Bigfoot Motel” and a huge neon feet around it. “I feel like I’m in a fucking amusement park”

“And I can’t believe you don’t even like Bigfoot”

“Why would I like Bigfoot? What even is there to like?”

“What is there not to?,” Liam replies slightly offended. “It’s hairy, tall, have big feets and lives in the woods. The few people who saw them said they grunted and growled. Is basically Derek.”

Liam isn’t expecting the big burst of laugh at his side, but he can’t say he doesn’t enjoy it.

 

*

 

“So what’s the plan?”

Liam turns to look at Theo from where he’s marking down on a map the easiest way to reach the sighting point that people in town talks so much. Theo isn’t exactly looking at him, his whole attention into the equipment he’s putting inside the backpack.

“What do you mean?,” Liam asks a bit confused. “We go to the woods, do the mating call and wait for Bigfoot”.

Maybe it’s not the best or more well thought plan, but it’s the one they are going to follow. Because Theo likes to be mouthy when they do hunting and this seems to be the best way to avoid a possible dead or supernatural maiming.

Theo’s gaze falls on him and Liam feels the need to preen.

“A mating call”

And the need is gone.

“It’s like--”

Liam puffs his chest out proudly because he didn’t watch hours upon hours of videos with people doing strange grunts and howlings for nothing. He didn’t make his neighbour think that he was completely crazy for nothing. Oh, no sir. He has this.

Taking a couple of deep breaths, Liam puts both hands at the sides of his mouth in a cuping motion and howls. Short but powerful exhalations that he had heard and seen to almost memory by now.

And now he was doing them.

In front of his crush.

Liam stops abruptly and refuses completely to feel ashamed, even if embarrassment burns deep down in his core.

“So that’s the mating call,” Theo looks impassive, his face a mask of whatever is going inside his head and Liam caves.

He’s definitely dying from mortification now.

“Yeah, I’ve seen videos--”

“You have seen videos,” Theo asks and raises a brow unimpressed, “Of Bigfoot’s mating call”

Liam keeps silent, because there’s no way that he’s going to open his mouth and not dig a deeper hole, but it seems to be the wrong answer. He’s not really sure there was a right answer to begin with, but Theo’s smirk just cements the idea that he just made the worst decision ever.

“Such a strange taste on porn you have”

Liam wonders how much praying would it take for him to just pop out of existence right about now.

 

*

 

“You know what I’m gonna do now?”

“Besides going into the woods at night like some crazy dude and dragging me with you to try to catch a legend made for tourist?”

Liam ignores him.

“I’m gonna eat one of those”

There’s a big sign across the road advertising the Bigfoot Burger at just $8.99. Right under the Mega Big Hamburger and with the very explicitly written ingredient of 2/3lb of meat _plus_ bacon.

Liam can almost taste the meatly heaven in his mouth.

“I’m not dragging you to the hospital later,” Theo scoffs but walks towards the diner anyways.

Liam will show him.

 

*

 

“I can feel my body shutting down,” Liam whines, forehead pressing against the diner table and arms clutching at his stomach.

“I told you,” Theo says nonchalantly, eating the younger boy’s fries and looking at Liam with no worry whatsoever. “I’m not taking you to the hospital”

Liam rolls his head to see the other guy and wrinkles his nose in distaste at the sight of food. And the smell of the grease and the meat and-- He’s sure he’s going to vomit.

“Can we just--”

“No”

“Tell my mom you left me here to die”

“Go tell her yourself,” Theo scoffs, as if that was a very clever retort. Which was completely not. “You can turn into one of your beloved ghosts”. Okay, maybe it was.

“I think I’ll puke as soon as I get up”

“Try to avoid my shoes”

“I’m specially puking on your shoes”

“I’m specially leaving you alone in the woods”. Theo smiles mischievously, his eyes glinting with amusement. “All stuffed now, Bigfoot will think you’re the dinner. Who do you think would run faster? You with your short little legs and those 2/3lb of meat on your stomach? Or a 8ft tall monster with hunger?”

Liam groans at the sole idea of moving a muscle.

“Yeah, that’s what I thought,” Theo replies and gets up. “Hey Bobby! Gimme another bigfoot burger for the ride!”

Liam’s groan this time is a bit more pitiful.

Maybe this is really the way he dies.

 

*

 

“So it wasn’t enough to give me stomach sickness with the greasy smell the whole ride here,” Liam complaints, watching Theo place the extra burger over a fallen and mossy tree, “You are actually trying to make a bear kill us”

“Not us. I can actually run pretty fast since I didn’t attempt to kill myself with my dinner”

“Who goes to a fast food diner and asks for a salad!?”

“The bear survivor”

Liam bends and tosses a piece of bark at Theo, just to scream at touch of something slimy crawling over his hand. The older guy laughs.

“Tell me that isn’t on camera”

“I could, but that would be lying”. Theo snorts and hugs the camera closer, as if Liam would make an attempt to take it. Which he was about to. “I’m sure the team will really enjoy that you catched a really wild and dangerous newt and sent it flying”

“The only thing dangerous here is--”

There’s the sound of a tree falling down and some branches breaking up the hill and Liam barely if stops the scream about to leave his body. It just takes one jump and he’s at Theo’s side, hiding behind him and gripping the sides of his coat fiercely.

“Hey Bigfoot!,” Theo screams, under the many attempts of Liam to shush him, “We got you a burger! It has your name! Come get it, big ball of fur!”

“Oh my god, you have a death wish,” Liam mutters under his breath before his brain shuts down and decides to feed Theo into more terrible ideas. “Maybe you should do the mating call”

Theo looks at him for over his shoulder and smiles. Liam is too obnubilate for a moment to ever think that that smile wasn’t, in fact, a very dreamy thing to see but more of like their demise.

“Hey! You monkey! I’m not going to do your stupid mate call, so come get your burger!”

The snapping gets a big closer and Liam glues himself even more against Theo’s back. His hands shake and he’s not really sure why he isn’t running as far as he can.

“Oh, fuck me,” Liam whines.

“Right now? You sure?”

Theo laughs as a forehead hits fiercely in the middle of his shoulder blades. Rain is starting to pour slowly and suddenly the whole idea of meeting Bigfoot isn’t exciting anymore. Liam reminds himself that it has nothing to do with the strange noises that they just heard and how fucking terrified he’s feeling.

No, sir. Just the rain.

And his stomach.

And maybe the way Theo keeps trying to provoke a pacific cryptid enough to kill them there for a greasy burger.

Yeah, that must be the one.

 

*

 

“Are you still cold?”

Yes, Liam is clearly still cold, because it keeps raining and his clothes are soaked and he’s shivering. But he doesn’t voice it out, too tired to even try to.

For some strange motive, while they start to walk back towards the truck, Theo doesn’t move away. He’s still firmly in front of Liam, like a protective shield or a really nice and warm wall of human muscle. A warm hand covers his own, still clutching into a tight grip the side of Theo’s coat, and his fingers tingle with small stabs of pain.

“We are close,” Theo mumbles, “It’s okay, you’re safe, just cold”

Liam wants to say that he’s not exactly safe.

They could slip with damp moss and break a bone. Or even their necks. Bigfoot could be running or throwing a rock towards them and they wouldn’t know because their backs are facing the depth of the woods. Or a bear. Or a very feisty newt.

But Theo’s hand is warm and his voice is soft, so Liam entertains the idea and believes him.

“There it is,” mumbles Theo and Liam cranes his neck to see past Theo’s back to what certainly is the truck fairly close, almost a block away. “Say bye bye to Bigfoot, Dunbar”.

Liam can’t help but let out a breathy laugh.

“Bye bye, Bigfoot”

“That’s my boy”

Liam is decided to convince himself that the fluttering in his stomach is the huge burger still trying to kill him from the inside and not the way Theo’s voice sounded almost fond.

 

*

 

**Old Alton Bridge (Goatman’s Bridge)**

_Argyle, Texas_

 

If he’s honest, Goatman’s Bridge sounds more like a really bad rated indie horror movie. Or a terribly written suspense book that barely if got sold. Everything had been giggles and fun, making jokes with Theo. That until the sun finally came down.

Now the bridge doesn’t look so fun anymore.

Good thing he’s prepared.

“What the fuck is that?”

Liam barely if raises his gaze towards Theo, before looking back down and adjust one of the water guns to the waistline of his pants.

“Holy water”

“That’s holy water,” Theo asks back, incredulity almost tangible in his voice, “On a water gun?”

“Look, they have their evil powers ready to maim and kill, I just wanted to be prepared”

“With _holy water_ in a _water gun_ ”

Liam doesn’t need to see the other guy to know he’s arching a brow at him in a questioning way or how his lips are curving in a teasing smirk because he most likely thinks that this is like a tinfoil hat kind of thing and not exactly the anti-demon weapon it is.

“Just for that, I’ll not save you when the demon comes after you”

“Not that shooting water at a demon would save anyone”

“It’s holy water!,” Liam snaps and loses, finally looking at Theo, who shrugs and widens his smirk into a full chesire smile.

“Whatever helps you sleep at night”

At this point he’s pretty sure that if he shoots at Theo, the holy water would start to burn him alive.

 

*

 

Just one foot.

“Hey Goatman! Look at us! We are on your bridge!”

Theo didn’t even wait until they were in the middle of the fucking bridge to start doing his thing. Or that Liam were already psyched enough to deal with his crap. No. Just one foot in, when Liam wasn’t even prepared yet.

“What are you doing!?”

“What does it looks like?,” Theo turns to look at him and smirks, “I’m _goating_ the Goatman”

“Did you just--?”

“C’mon Goatman! I’m disrupting your bridge! Come teach me a lesson, throw me out of it!”

“Would you fucking--!,” Liam hisses, trying and failing to cover Theo’s mouth to shut him.

Theo avoids Liam hold, trying to make himself as taller as possible. “Throw Liam! He’s shorter and weights less!”

“Don’t thread me into this shitshow!,” Liam turns around at the vast darkness from the end side of the bridge, “Don’t listen to him!”

“See? You’re talking to the demon now”

Liam turns back towards Theo, who has the camera right up at his face and smirks behind it like the fucking psycho he is. The younger boy gapes in disbelief. “I can’t believe you just--”

“You’re making progress”

“The only progress I’m making is getting closer to being a _murderer_ and taking you as my first victim”

“Well, get me on the loop if you start to feel the murders, buddy”

With a last chuckle, Theo turns to focus the camera around them and keep goading the demon into doing them some kind of harm or show himself in front of them. Just like that. Not even giving Liam’s threat a second thought or any kind of importance at all.

He can’t even threaten someone’s life without being ridiculed in the process.

Unbelievable.

 

*

 

Just in case he gets murdered tonight, Liam takes his time and appreciates the silhouette that the candle lights give Theo.

He ignores the ouija board, the planchette, even the fact that it’s fucking freezing and he’s in the middle of a bridge where a demon pushes people to their death. Nope. Nothing of that is relevant to this moment. Just Theo and how the light and shadows plays on his profile, making the guy look softer than ever. All his hard edges erased, making Theo look younger and even relaxed in a way that travelling around the country would only bring him.

Liam itches to touch and kiss. To pet his hair until Theo falls asleep over him or rub his back until the last ounce of stress melts down from his shoulders. He wants to hold, and care and--

“Ready to meet some horny boys, Liam?”

And that’s how the spell is broken.

 

*

 

Liam whimpers and his legs twitch with what’s clearly the need to run the fuck away in the moment the planchette under his fingers moves to the letter G.

“Oh god, oh shit, no, this can’t be happening, no, no, _this_ ** _can’t_** _be happening_ ”

“I guess by your cries for help that you’re not moving the planchette”

As if in cue to being called out, it moves to the O and Liam can feel the fear spread across his whole body. Shivers that are far from cold assaulting every muscle. This is the moment they both die. All that taunting, all the screaming, lead up to this.

“Of course I’m not moving it! Why would I move it in the first place?”

“Well, I don’t know, maybe to get more viewers to this shitshow”

The planchette moves to the A and Liam feels closer to passing out. He’s going to kill Theo before the fucking demon gets to him. Then at least he’ll get to die knowing what vengeance tasted like.

“We’re going to die here,” Liam whines, “We are going to die under the claws of fucking Goatman and you can’t--,” the planchette moves to the T and Liam almost shrieks, “And you can’t stop being a jerk!”

The M comes next and Liam can see his hands shake but doesn’t dare to pull his fingers away. What if all those creepy stories on the internet were real? What if the demon possessed one of them? He’ll have to shove the water gun down Theo’s throat in attempt to keep himself alive.

Theo chuckles in the exact same moment that the planchette moves to the A.

“It’s just a piece of cardboard,” Theo assures and Liam pulls his gaze reluctantly from the ouija board to lock it on the other guy’s green eyes with surprise written all over his face, “You don’t have to worry”

“Just a piece of--? _I don’t have to worry_? The fucking thing is moving and we are going to die here, in the middle of a bridge and you tell me not to worry!?”

The planchette reaches the N and tears start to burn at the corners of Liam’s eyes. He just wanted to do his first project, to follow a successful work career and instead here he was, sharing the last moments of his life with someone that looked at the face of danger and spat on it.

“You’re sure you weren’t moving it?”

“I wasn’t moving it, I wasn’t--”

“Good, because I was”

Liam never felt closer to break the supernatural rules that his brain has hoarded with the passing of years like in this one moment. Ready to ask the demon to just take him now and end this torture.

 

*

 

Somewhere along the line, Liam starts having the queer crisis he didn’t have in his adolescence.

Specially when his eyes fall over Theo, just occupying a place in the world near him, looking gorgeous and unattainable with his green eyes and his muscles and his _‘I just got out of a fashion magazine’_ vibe.

He doesn’t exactly thinks it can get worse.

Oh, but it can.

Like when Theo just wakes up, scratching his stubble and his eyes too heavy because of how bad they slept inside the sleep bags over the hard cold floor of another haunted place. His eyes still not quite having that spark of evil amusement Liam’s so used to see but rather soft on the edges and far more vulnerable. Sometimes there’s drool at the corner of his mouth, that Liam wants to reach and clean with his thumb. Other times, there’s the lines of the sleep bag tattooed momentarily over his face, that makes Liam have crazy thoughts. Like leaning in for a morning kiss.

Like asking Theo to stay with him for more than just a stupid project.

And it’s not even that Theo is the first guy he ever liked. There was that time he thought he liked Mason, a really short moment of his life. And Brett, for an even shorter one. And Nolan, for almost a blink of his life.

Theo is not the first guy he ever liked, but it’s the first he ever wanted to spend a big chunk of his life with.

And setting demons, ghouls and ghost aside, isn’t that the scariest thing ever.

 

*

 

**Gallows Hill Woods**

_Salem, Oregon_

 

Witches, dude.

Why does people want to see witches.

“I’m actually sure that the whole thing with ghost witches is part of the plot of a really bad movie and have nothing to do with reality”

“Well, yeah, I guess,” Liam mumbles, scrolling through his phone. Theo’s tapping his fingers over the steering wheel in a tell tale that this is a bit unsettling. And Liam gets him, because this involves actual people and not just a supernatural entity that may or not be real. People that was abused and tortured before death because of unfounded accusations. “We are not going anywhere near from any movie set. We are going to the part of the woods that’s supposed to be haunted”

“How is a part of the woods haunted?”

“Well, people hear noises and weird sounds. Steps following them. Sometimes high pitched screams”

“Hearing noises? In the woods? Shocking”

“There’s sighting of things too, asshole,” Liam growls, “Like red eyes and stuff like that”

“Hmm, red eyes and something paranormal. Why does it sound familiar?

“Okay, yeah, red eyes, I get it--”

“ _Spooky_ red eyes, Liam. Don’t forget the spooky part”

“Spooky red eyes,” Liam parrots back, emotionless. “But the witches”

“They’re most likely cultist, y’know. One of your people”

“ _One of my_ \--? How does it make them my people?”

“The bullshit believers, there’s a horde of you. If we find one of them, remember to show them your certificate for being part of the club so they don’t use your blood for sacrifice”

“My blood? Why my blood?”

“Eh,” Theo shrugs, “It’s the pretty face. They’ll be drawn at you like flies to honey”.

Liam gapes at Theo, who looks back at him for a moment with a indescifrable smile and then back to the road. Words seem to have died somewhere along the lane from his brain to his mouth and just a strangled noise comes out from Liam’s lips before he looks away in a sign of defeat.

It may also have something to do with how he bites down his tongue to avoid saying that from both of them, Theo’s definitely the one with the pretty face.

Nothing anyone can prove.

 

*

 

The woods are dark and empty. There are noises everywhere that his brain can’t stop to point out with a sudden alarm going off inside his head. And Theo trying to sooth him by narrating not only what each sound is but also the whole walk towards what probably would be their certain death, it’s not helping one bit.

He’s also tired and cold. His feet keep sinking into the snow over and over. And more than once he found himself knee deep into it, while Theo lost his mind and laughed at his face without any shame.

Maybe that’s why he feels a sudden flare of bravery.

Or maybe is just his foolishness.

"Is there _anybody_ out here?"

Stupid, stupid sense of security.

Theo’s face lit up and Liam barely has a second to understand the weight of his actions. He just prompted madness to happen.

"Any cultist? Anyone up to no good? Cutting a goat's or a cat's head off?"

"Jesus fucking christ, Theo, you're going to get us murdered one day"

"You think so?"

"Yeah"

"Well, hope it's supernatural at least. We need something besides you screaming on camera"

Bushes move, harshly and deafening.

Liam freezes.

This is definitely not going as he would have liked to.

"Hello? We are here for the cult stuff. We saw the ad on Craigslist."

"They aren't going to be hiding on the bushes, _right_?," Liam’s desperation can be pretty much be tasted in the air.

"Sure they would. They're cultists, Liam, there's no etiquettes when you're a cultist"

The bushes moves again and Liam pretty much jumps to get closer to Theo, their sides uncomfortably glued together in a way that strangely reassures Liam a bit.

Unfortunately, Theo takes it more like a _‘keep going, please’_ thing.

"Hey! You can't do cult stuff here! Put the cat down and take your cloak off!"

"Dude! Shut the fuck up!," Liam hisses, elbowing Theo’s ribs and barely if getting any contact due to the really thick jacket he has on. Stupid luck.

"My friend here has a water gun and he's not afraid to use it"

"It's holy water!"

He doesn’t exactly know why does he need to clarify that there’s no basic water in the water gun that isn’t really strapped to his hip but thrown at the back of the tuck, but he still does. Maybe it’s his will to live talking, who knows. The thing is that it works, the bushes suddenly stop moving. And it would ease his mind if it wasn’t by the fact that there’s no other sound whatsoever. No wind. No branches or leaves. No steps on the snow getting closer or further away.

Nothing.

Zip.

Zero.

_Nada._

"This is very Blair Witch, right? Just what you wanted". Theo cuts the silence and Liam tries very hard to not feel grateful at all, but he does.

"Yeah, sure, why not," Liam mumbles nervously and turns back the road they were coming from, tugging at Theo’s , "Let's get the fuck out of here, I’m freezing"

“The codename for fucking scared”

For once, Liam couldn’t argue with that.

 

*

 

“I don’t exactly get why we have to do this things at night when we are in the middle of fucking winter,” Liam mumbles and his voice breaks a bit at the shivers of his body.

“Well, you wanted credibility,” Theo replies, “And your kind of people think that night is the best moment to contact spirits and ghouls and creatures. Because it seems like that’s the moment they decide to go out for a drink and get funky.”

Liam glares at Theo but it loses power at the new shiver coursing down his spine. His teeth clatter for a second before he can control his own jaw, but the temblors are impossible to stop. No matter how hard he hugs himself or how much he tries to psyche himself into believing the cold isn’t really that bad.

But it is that bad.

He’s sure that in just a couple of seconds more, he’ll die from hypothermia.

“You really out do yourself, huh _Dumb_ ar?”

There’s a biting insult at the tip of his tongue that dies quickly at the soft warmth embracing him. Liam is roughly aware that Theo opened his jacket and is cocooning them inside it together before he sighs in pleasure. Not missing one second, Liam buries his freezing nose on Theo’s under jaw and slips his almost dead cold hands under Theo’s clothes to steal as much body warmth as possible. Theo hisses but doesn’t move from where he’s standing, instead hugging Liam a bit more closely.

“You should get a thicker coat,” the older guy mumbles, his lips brushing Liam’s temple.

The younger boy can feel the vibrations of the words on the tip of his nose, which means that blood is once more flowing towards it. Testing his theory, he flexes his fingers slightly. The feeling of pain and needles on his fingertips that he’s almost getting used at this point is there and the skin under them is turning colder, so he shifts them to Theo’s lower back and groans in pleasure at the heat.

“Oh god, you’re so hot,” Liam mumbles, pressing impossibly close to the other body that’s, in fact, not dying from cold like he is.

“Yeah, I hear that often,” Theo chuckles and Liam in any other circumstance would probably snark at the older guy, but he can’t find the strength to do so. Theo seems to understand it too, letting his head fall over Liam’s with a hum, letting the taunting die.

They keep silent, Liam snuggling Theo out in the open in what would look like some kind of indecent groping and Theo there, just taking it. And it’s strangely moving. The warmth is starting to lull the younger boy a bit, getting him to a point of sleepiness that he’s sure the other guy would not really appreciate. Not that anyone would appreciate him drooling over them. But Theo probably even less.

“‘M getting sleepy,” Liam mumbles, because better safe than sorry.

“Okay,” Theo replies, but doesn’t exactly moves an inch to pull him away.

“We should leave,” insists Liam but this time it’s him the one who doesn’t move.

“We should, yeah,” Theo replies and shuffles a bit, the material from his jacket making a weird baggy noise that strangely settles Liam a bit more. “Once your hands are a bit warmer”

Liam doesn’t mention that, out in the woods, it’s impossible that his hands will get any warmer than they already are. Doesn’t matter how much he clings to the human warmth that Theo provides, it’s just impossible.

Instead he nods, breathes in a bit more of the cologne that Theo’s wearing that kinda makes his nose itch a bit and that mixes perfectly with the peculiar smell of the woods and cold, relaxing. The thoughts of ghost witches, cult people and dying in the freezing cold being pushed at the back of his mind by the soft pressure of lips at his temple.

It’s not even a kiss, more like Theo trying to settle himself more comfortable, and Liam can’t help himself but to wish it would.

 

*

 

“How about aliens?,” Liam asks, his gaze down into his lap where a map is halfway open and marked, and on top of it a small notepad doing valiant efforts to not fly away at every small bump on the road.

They left Oregon not so long ago and he may or may not be searching for reasons to both not finish the trip yet and avoid spending another night in the middle of nowhere just to wait to be murdered by a cryptid or a crazy sect.

“What about them?”

Liam looked up and levered Theo with a glare, who didn’t even dignify to look away from the road for a couple of seconds, ignoring the younger boy completely. Liam couldn’t help but feel complete and utterly offended, even if that was a good thing since they were less prone to crash and die because of bickering.

“I’m asking if you believe in them”

“Who doesn’t believe in aliens this days?,” Theo replies, his fingers tapping on the steering wheel at a broken tune that sounds very timid in the background, full of static and the singing voice blending the words into barely noise. Liam finds it almost terrifying and even more the fact that Theo seems to actively enjoy it.

“We could go hunt UFOs then”. Liam’s gaze falls down into the map, trying to find the closest UFO sighting place he marked on the map before starting this whole nonsense in four wheels. “We are not so far from--”

“Hunting UFOs is very vague,” the older boy replies to the question no one asked him about and shrugs, as if that would crash Liam’s ego a bit less more. “I mean if your vision is fucked up enough any bird is a UFO. That or if you live in a constant state of fear, which you do”

Oh, so he wasn’t softening the blow to his ego. He was just aiming perfectly at where to shoot the amazing commentary that was far from accurate in a wild attempt to break Liam down to his core. Which he didn’t attain. Because Theo was clearly full of lies.

“Pfft, I don’t live in a constant state of fear,” Liam dismisses, frowning slightly and crossing his arms over his chest in a movement that’s too defensive but he doesn’t care. Because he doesn’t have anything to be defensive about. No, sir.

“Really,” Theo drawls and shoots a quick glance towards Liam before looking back to the road and snorting loudly. “Sure thing. You aren’t trying to find something more chill than stepping in the middle of the woods at night searching for a cryptid because you’re scared then?”

Damn it.

Liam opens and closes his mouth, unable to find any kind of explanation that doesn’t tip him into doing exactly what he was accused of. After a couple of seconds, he gives up and slides down the seat a bit with a grunt, tightening hold of his arms over his chest. It’s a powerful move that always works on Mason, the childish tantrum of silence treatment.

Not so much with Theo, his melodic laugh filling the cabin of the truck and drowning the creepy music completely.

And what if he’s in a constant state of fear? It’s survival of the fittest on it’s prime.

 

*

 

**Mothman sighting**

_Point Pleasant, West Virginia_

 

“It looks nothing like a moth”. It’s surprising how much surprise and disinterest lays on Theo’s voice. Probably more disinterest than anything. “I can’t find a single thing that’s from a moth”.

“I know, right?,” Liam breathes out in awe, rounding the statue that’s in front of them. “It’s more like one of those really weird bad guys on Power Rangers”

“Power Rangers, Liam? Seriously?”

Liam glares at him but it’s not as powerful as it usually would, since he’s clearly embarrassed too. “It’s not like I watch the Power Rangers now. I did when I was a kid and now it’s sort of fire branded into my memory and-- y’know what? I don’t have to explain anything to you”

Theo shrugs, the amused smile still dancing on his lips and Liam wishes Mothman came here right this instant and swiped him from this misery. Because he’s now in that ground where even Theo being an ass is doing his heart do the fluttery thing he absolutely does not want it to do.

His gaze falls back into the statue in search of something that would give him anything else to think about.

“This guy it’s ripped”

Theo turns and arches a brow at him in question. “You’re checking Mothman out?”. The amused smile return, this time with a glint of mischief. “Oh, I get it now, you have a secret monster kink. That’s what this is about?”

Liam blushes, splutters and gestures with both his hands towards the fake metal-y and very protruding abs from the Mothman statue in front of them. “I’m not-- it’s literally in front of my face! How can I not notice!?”

“Sure, blame your secret kink into the fact that you’re pocket sized”. But even as he says so, his gaze roams towards the statue, assessing. This time is Theo who rounds it and huffs a mirthless laugh. “I’m hotter than Mothman”.

Okay, that.

That is correct.

And very much not the point.

“Are you comparing yourself to Mothman?,” Liam asks baffled before shaking himself out of it. “You know what? I don’t wanna know. You can have your strange match with Mothman, I’ll go ask rurals”

Theo huffs louder and follows.

Liam pretends that he doesn’t hear him repeat in a whisper, almost offended, that he is indeed hotter than Mothman.

He also pretends he doesn’t agree.

 

*

 

“Well, reports say that Mothman squeaks like a mouse so we should--”

“What? Rehearse? I don’t think we need that”

Liam looks at Theo, that’s sprawled over his single bed, playing with the settings of the camera. Or taking pictures of the mold spots on the ceiling. Who know what weird interest Theo might have.

“And why not? We did it with Bigfoot, we--”

“ _You_ did it with Bigfoot, I have memories of--”

“Okay, yeah, I did it,” Liam’s face feels way too hot to blame the heather and surely is way too red to blame the biting cold weather. So option C it is then. Ignoring it completely. “That’s why we both should do it now because--”

“You just need to speak with your normal voice, Liam. You’ll communicate just fine.”

He’s glad to find out that Theo’s undignified squawk at being swatted with a pillow is pretty close to Mothman’s call too.

 

*

 

Since this is the last stop before they get back to California and their respective jobs, Liam may have a plan to let Theo know that he’s interested into being more than supernatural hunting partners or HowlFill coworkers.

Maybe it’s not exactly the best one, but it’s a plan.

And that’s all it counts.

 

*

 

“Y’know, this actually looks like we are dating”

Theo stops chewing on his pizza, with his too much teeth and grunting for something that’s just dough technique, cheese and salsa instead of a living creature trying to kill him back. “What?”

“Well, we do roadtrips, eat in tables for two, sleep together most of the time--,” Liam doesn’t exactly want to shift on his chair, but he still does. They do sleep together but mostly because he’s too chicken shit to come back to an empty room after they just stood out in the middle of nowhere calling for a paranormal entity to do something, so Theo resigns to leave his room empty and go to Liam’s instead. Now getting to the point where they just rent one room for two. Theo is still looking at him and Liam tries to looks as nonchalant as possible about what he’s saying, but he’s by far missing his cue. “-- the only difference with actual dating is that instead of to a movie, we go out to see if we catch something paranormal or my early death on camera”.

Theo hums, tears his gaze away from Liam and starts chewing on his pizza slice again. Liam looks at him baffled because **a)** how much of a messy eater can Theo be to even disgust him? and **b)** the asshole just completely ignored him.

As usual.

“Did you listen to what I just said?”. There’s a tinge of murdering anger seasoning his voice but if Theo noticed, he completely ignored it too.

“Yeah, I did,” Theo says, his green gaze falling back on Liam and locking there. There’s no more pizza on his hands, but he takes the can of beer on the table and gulps from it without breaking eye contact.

Liam is finding really hard not to just punch the can into Theo’s face and merge it with his teeth.

“So?,” Liam breathes out between clenched teeth.

“That you’re wrong”

“How can I be wrong? We literally do those things, we--”

“People dating _kiss_ , Liam. They kiss and hold hands while they do all that stuff, so you’re wrong”.

Liam groans and closes his eyes for a moment, both hands covering his face. He can’t believe he’s doing this in the middle of a diner just a couple of hours before they go into the woods in the middle of nowhere to go see if Mothman is real. Why did he even think it was a good idea? He should have done it in the middle of the woods, so when Theo started to do his usual assholery, he could just leave him there alone to be snatched away and blame the odds. Maybe he would even be lucky enough to not have to get his hands dirty and they’d find Mothman for real to put a stop to this madness.

But no.

He is a sappy fuck, that’s why.

And under another imminent threat to his life that could or could not exist, who knows, he wants to let Theo on the loop of feelings happening.

Dragging the hands down his face, Liam opens his eyes and looks at Theo with a mixture of aggressive resolve and just plain aggressiveness. Theo smirk at him and Liam _knows_ he knows, but the asshole isn’t going to falter and Liam knows that too.

One of his hands shoots forward to grab Theo’s and slaps both intertwined appendages over the plastic table. And for a couple of seconds, Liam takes special satisfaction on the way he seems to had shocked Theo enough to keep him silent for more than one second.

“How about now, huh? Do we look like we are dating now, asshole?”

But when he looks up, the other boy just smirks at him

“I don’t know, Liam. You could be taking my hand because we are contacting a spirit, because we are praying, because you want me to test how greasy or sweaty your hand is. There’s a million reasons why--”

Liam leans forward quickly and smashes his mouth over Theo’s. It lacks of any finesse, the force to which his body collides against the small diner table making it tumble and almost toppling it over. The kiss almost too painful, but at this point Liam isn’t sure if he’s kissing Theo because that’s what he wanted or because that’s the quickest way to shut him up.

He’ll go with the second, because it’s easier to explain.

Not so much the swirl of emotions taking ahold of his insides though.

When he tries to pull away, Theo’s free hand tangles at the back of his neck and pulls him back in. The kiss this time is softer, chaste for a soft second before Theo moves his lips trying to ask for permission, which Liam grants almost instantly with a whimper that’s too desperate, too needy---

And someone gasps.

It’s not from their table and it isn’t Theo’s voice, so Liam pulls away quickly and plops down over his chair, that scrapes over the floor as if they needed more attention towards them. Liam doesn’t dare to look around to try to catch the one person that can live in the same town as a cryptid and celebrate it but gets frightened by two boys kissing, so his gaze keeps locked on Theo, who smirks back at him and squeezes the hand that he never let go off.

There’s mirth dancing on his gaze and Liam can’t avoid but to think that maybe his theory of this guy being a literal spawn of hell isn’t so crazy as it sounds.

“You had this all thing planned, didn’t you?”

“Always the smartest one, huh?”

“I’m going to kill you in your sleep”

“Well, aren’t you the sweetest, darling”

“I hate you”

“Sure about that, Dunbar?”

Liam doesn’t get enough room to retort because suddenly Theo’s the one leaning over the table and capturing his lips in a sizzling kiss. This time, no gasp or any kind of awkward sound can force Liam to pull away. Theo’s lips like an outer world experience that takes his whole attention once and for all.

 

*

 

The rustling of leaves around them haven’t stopped one fucking second since they got to the woods and Liam’s will into believing that it’s only the wind playing on him is thoroughly dimming and switching into just running towards the truck and forget this thing all together.

For the hundredth time since this whole project started.

“It’s just Mothman, Liam,” Theo says nonchalantly, almost as if it was a game, and points the camera at him, “What can it do? A little chewing on your bones? Drag you deeper into the woods? Taking you out on a midnight flight?”

“It’s not going to do anything of that,” Liam breathes out and suppresses a shiver of sheer panic at a sound that’s too much like a growl, “I’ll push you towards it and then run away, leave you for dead”

Theo snorts loudly, “Big talk for someone with legs so short”

“IT’S LITERALLY JUST ONE INCH---”

Another growl.

This time louder.

And a bit more closer.

“Theo?”. Liam’s voice is squeaky and breaks at the end, but it’s not that he cares about it right about now. He just heard a nightmare come true and running seems to take too much to load on his brain, because he’s frozen in place.

It sounds again.

In the very fucking way, the very fucking place and-- _it’s the very fucking same_.

Liam fumbles with the light that at some point he forgot was on his hand, taking what seems like a life or death bet, and points it towards Theo, who’s covering his sniggers with a hand clutched hard over his mouth while the other taps on his phone.

“I was just trying to give you the whole experience,” comes the shaky voice of the traitor he kissed no long ago.

“The whole experience of a heart attack!?”

He can’t believe it. He fell for a fucking Judas.

“Pfft, no,” but his tone of voice couldn’t be more of a _yes_ , “Of having a boyfriend and a supernatural experience, make your night.”

Liam could explode. He could pretty much throw the flashlight towards Theo’s head. But the way the other boy chuckles freely, forgetting the stress of the situation they are in and the cold eating up their bones is far more stronger than anything else.

Also there’s the thing with the washing relief of seeing himself out of immediate mortal danger.

With a sigh, Liam takes a last look around, illuminating every little corner just to be sure before passing by Theo’s side and bumping their shoulders with more strength that needed. While he might not be able to get mad at Theo by the stunt, it doesn’t mean he can’t be petty about it.

“What would make my night right now would be walking the fuck out of here,” Liam empathizes on that by starting to walk his way back the road to where truck is parked, “ando go to my hotel room to enjoy the bed”

“Well, we can do that”

Liam has to admit that he’s pretty petty by nature too.

“Really?,” the younger boy drawls, “After that? You’re lucky I’m not breaking up with you right now”

At this point, Liam is getting pretty accustomed to Theo’s laugh being the soundtrack to his undignified retreat most of the times. So he keeps his resolution of not getting angry at the antics of the jackass he fell for.

He still throws a punch at his face for old times sake though.

 

*

 

There’s the excuse of the cold winter night and his body not being able to get any heat back. In reality, Liam is fucking melting because the heather broke and they can’t turn it off, but he knows now that Theo likes him and he wants to take advantage of that.

Not completely, because even if they kissed, they still have this thing where taunting the other about wanting to get close is rule. But he doesn’t mind, that’s what the excuse is for.

“You’re sweating,” Theo scoffs, half asleep, but pulls him closer to his chest.

“It’s from the cold,” Liam says like the big bad liar he is.

Theo snorts, because he clearly can feel the hot skin against his, starting to make him sweat. Liam guesses it's just a matter of seconds before Theo pushes him away and tells him to go to sleep on his own fucking bed.

It never happens.

Instead Theo twists enough to cover Liam with his own body and hums softly, placing a kiss in his forehead before absently nosing at the younger boy’s hairline, mumbling something about taking a shower, and fall into a deep sleep.

It’s different from other times they shared a bed. Those would have involved having Liam freaking out about a ghost or a demon, with their backs glued together instead of their fronts, and the whole cuddly thing being just an aftermath of two bodies twisting and moving around in bed to find comfort.

Liam smiles, one of his hands tracing light patterns over the other boy’s back, enjoying the very clingy way in which Theo holds him close.

Yeah, this is definitely different.

He can’t wait for the morning cuddles to start.

 

*

 

It’s by his own volition that Liam does the walk of shame back to his bed in the middle of the night.

He might be head over heels for Theo and want with all the strength of his body to be part of some really craved morning cuddles, but there’s only enough torture a guy can endure.

 

*

 

The whole ride back, Liam can't shake the gleeful feeling in the middle of his chest. His project is finally done, with a double copy just for safety, that will most likely gain him the recognition he wants. He also got a boyfriend in the process, that it's a complete asshole but terribly sweet when you least expect him and immensely hot at the same time.

Life seems to be smiling up at him now.

What can possibly go wrong?

 

*

 

 

He shouldn't have asked in the first place.

 

*

 

“Your project is a success!,” Scott beams at him from the entrance to his cubicle and Liam startles for a second at the sudden surprise, before turning and smiling brightly.

It hasn’t really been long since they got back to California, still bone tired for the road trip. And even if Theo had assured him that he would take care of the footage and the editing, the whole thing had been eating Liam’s nerves at the point that get any feedback from his project, beyond Theo saying that he submitted it properly, was enough to put him up the clouds.

“It is?,” Liam asks with an excitement that could match Scott’s effortlessly. “Laura liked it?”

“And Derek,” Stiles points out, appearing at Scott’s side. “He’s tougher to convince. But it seems that you did a great job. Congrats, puppy”

Liam ignores the nickname in sake of trying to milk out more information. Because knowing that his bosses likes it isn’t enough. No. He needs to know every damn detail just to rub it into Mason’s face later. “Yeah? I didn’t think he was into supernatural things, but I’m glad he--”

“Oh, he’s not,” cuts Stiles, his attention quickly switching from Liam’s face, the one that’s falling into a contradicting mixture of emotions that goes from despair to disconcert, towards every little knick knack over the young guy’s desk. “But the mushy couple-y stuff? You sold him there”

“What”

Liam blinks at Stiles, who looks at Scott with what could be maybe a bit of concern, before looking back at Liam once more.

“The whole _‘falling in love with a jackass who wants to kill me from a scare’_?,” Stiles’ facial expression can be easily read as a wholesome questioning mark. One that Liam has no answers for.

“The what now,” Liam’s voice comes clipped, almost blank.

Scott frowns and locks gazes with Stiles, probably getting into one of their silent conversations, before looking at the younger guy like if he was a scared animal ready to attack. Which wasn’t too far from truth. “Your project,” he says slowly as if Liam needed the slow motion to help him understand, “The one where you guys chase supernaturals and fall in love in the process?”

Liam keeps himself silent for far too long maybe, because Stiles stops touching everything that’s a few inches away from his hand and Scott’s frown just gets a matching tilt of his head. Both of them trying to get a read of the sudden catatonic state Liam fell into. And he’s not really proud to say it takes a little bit of extra time for his head to wrap around what’s happening.

Around his fucking boyfriend not only showing the world that he’s as tough as a damn cotton ball, that every little weird sound sends him into a frenzy of distress and that one of his freaked out screams could compete against any soprano there’s out there in the world.

No.

He also covered the whole clusterfuck of how they got together.

Liam doesn’t have enough peace of mind to enjoy the way both Stiles and Scott quickly get out of the way when he abruptly gets up from his chair. Or the way that Stiles’ mouth keeps very shut and quiet. Or how Scott seems to flail a bit too much like his glued to the hip best friend instead of himself. Not even the soft whisper from Scott that sounded too much like _‘we should call for backup’_.

Simple pleasures in life he can’t get to enjoy, because his mind is settled into the murder function now. The one he so much joked or half assedly all the time on the road trip.

Just now Theo doesn’t get and out.

No, sir.

He’s going to die in a very Romeo way, just without a Juliet and way more bloodier.

 

*

 

“You asshole!”

Theo is smugly sitting under the sun, this time on one of the benches HowlFill has on the rooftop. Back to the corresponding table, his elbows propped over it to let him stylishly sprawled and welcoming the warmth like the human version of every asshole cat Liam has met. Especially now, with the part where Theo barely if acknowledges him, tipping his head to a side towards the younger boy direction for a second, just to look back up towards the huge star. The younger guy can feel his blood boil a bit more and he’s pretty sure it’s not the sunny weather of California. He silently hopes that Theo gets sunburn.

“You left on the tapes how we got together! The whole world is going to see that now! How am I going to face my mom? _How am I going to face Mason?_ I can’t lie to Mason now. He’ll know I ended up falling for an asshole that’s now my boyfriend and that I--”

“Boyfriends”.

That’s the only thing that Theo seems to take out from his rant and it stops Liam on his tracks. Oh no. No, they’re not playing this game now. Liam growls in a way that he hopes sounds threatening and not like _‘yes, I’ve also spent hours watching werewolf videos just in case’_. Theo knows what he’s doing, knows what he did and there’s no way he will distract Liam enough to turn this on his favor. Of course not. Liam’s not going to fall for it.

Except it seems he is.

“Yes Theo, _boyfriends_ ,” Liam mumbles between clenched teeth and tries very hard to suppress the little voice in his head that tells him to just put an end to this talk with a hand fisted and colliding in the middle of that beautiful face. “You said it first”

“Did I?”

Is he kidding now?

This is his big trick? To rile Liam up enough to turn a simple and quick murder into a _‘ripping off every limb of your body and hitting you with it’_ kind of deal?

Liam can almost hear another voice, too much alike Mason’s, that tells him to back down a couple notched. He promptly ignore it. There would be time later to deal with it, when he has a dead boyfriend not ruining his life.

And yet, he finds himself replying almost in an automatic motion.

“Hunting Mothman. You kept playing that stupid growling record and you said that you wanted to give me the whole experience of a boyfriend and catching a supernatural thing and--”

Liam isn’t quite sure when Theo stood from his place under the perfect ray of sunlight that kissed his features as if it was sent down to earth for that sole purpose or how is it even possible that the asshole isn’t even sweating, but now the older boy is right up there. In front of him, a smirk dancing on his lips and his head halfway tilted down as if he was about to kiss Liam but hasn’t yet found the right moment.

“Oh, yeah, I did,” Theo’s voice comes like a sultry purr, “I remember that now”.

Liam blinks up at him because what was the thing they were discussing now?

He doesn’t remember. His eyes doesn’t leave Theo’s lips, no matter how hard he tries. Not that he knows at all, because he didn’t even tried in the first place. The same way he didn’t even tries to remember what was happening.

“What?,” he mumbles dumbly, mostly because he wants to see Theo’s mouth move and not because he really cares about what they were talking before.

“You. Me. Boyfriends,” Theo whispers leaning closer.

Liam nods his head once. Twice. He’s not really sure how many times, probably enough to give him whiplash.

“Yeah,” he breathes out, leaning closer just to find that Theo slowly pulls away. When he notices, he’s starting to step on his tiptoes and the smirk on the other guy twisted from sensual to completely mischievous.

“You were mad at me,” Theo informs him with a fake pout, “About being boyfriends”

“Yeah,” Liam replies, then blinks and frowns in confusion. “No. What?”

He’s about to ask what exactly is Theo talking about, because the last couple of minutes have pretty much erased themselves from his memory but he’s sure that was not the point at all. But the older boy finally leans down and kisses him, provoking that the rest of Liam’s ability to reason flies out the window. A tongue at the seam of his mouth and a playful nip on his bottom lip asking for permission, enough to demolish any trace of whatever was happening before.

Who cares what you were angry about when a hot guy is kissing you anyways?

 

*

 

The trick works more than once.

 

*

 

It turns out Liam cares for what he was angry about.

Because he’s still angry about it.

When the show is finally aired and it not only gets million upon millions of views but also comments about _‘shortie is so fucking scared’_ or _‘I can’t believe they ended up together like this_ or even people thirsting in variable degrees for his boyfriend. That’s when Liam remembers what was exactly the reason why he should be having a dead boyfriend right now and not a smoking hot living one.

It might take him 3 months, but he finally punches that beautiful face with all the strength that the lack of dignity have left on his body.

 

*

 

Stiles films it and uploads it to the vlog of HowlFill.

'Cryptic ways to say I love you' gets to be one of the more watched videos, after the supernatural ones.

Liam is still trying to decipher how does he feels about it.

 

*

 

It gets a remix with Theo falling in slowmo at the rhythm of _'hmmm whatcha say'_.

Theo hates it with all his soul.

Liam decides that he feels quite happy about it after all.

**Author's Note:**

>  **Credits to the UFO thingy**  
>  http://jilylicious.tumblr.com/post/156262875198/actually-ufo-is-very-vague-i-mean-if-your-vision


End file.
